Happy Canada Day, one and all.
What a great country we live in.
Our government is respected by those few people outside the country that notice (or care) we exist. We're a democracy; we generally tend not to throw people in jail without a good reason. (Hell, we don't like to throw people in jail no matter what the reason.) We don't go barging into other countries to make war, even if some people think that's what Afghanistan's about; instead, we invite the whole world here and give them all free rein to bring their wars with them.
We believe in one health care system accessible to all...which is a good thing, since it keeps eating up more and more of our money: sooner or later we'll have no choice but to go and live in hospitals.
We're a tolerant nation. So long as you're not the American government, a born-again Christian, or a Canadian celebrity, we'll tolerate you just fine. We go out of our way not to offend groups whose members have explicitly threatened us and our way of life. The concept of "treason" is unknown in Canada. Indeed, this is perhaps the only country on the planet in which excessive nationalism is itself considered vaguely treasonous.
Check this out. This is the original version of O Canada. You hear a little snippet of it at hockey games in Toronto, but you'd have to attend a Habs home game to get the whole thing:
O Canada! Land of our forefathers
Thy brow is wreathed with a glorious garland of flowers.
As in thy arm ready to wield the sword,
So also is it ready to carry the cross.
Thy history is an epic of the most brilliant exploits.
Thy valour steeped in faith
Will protect our homes and our rights
Will protect our homes and our rights.
Yike. It doesn't rhyme and the scansion sucks, but let's ignore that for a minute. Far worse horrors lurk within.
Line 1: where are the foremothers, eh? Granted, the version we all know prominently features "in all thy sons command" (which I have heard more than once changed to 'in all of us command', but they haven't made this change official yet.) Remember, this was written in 1906, before we allowed women to vote. Has our government apologized for this yet? After all, it often seems like we've apologized for everything else. As long as the offence happened years ago, we're all ready with the apologies. If it's happening now, buster, you're on your own.
Line 3: an arm? ready to wield a sword? How grotesque is that? We are a nation of peacekeepers. Everyone knows this: it's why we rank behind such luminaries as Namibia in terms of peacekeepers per capita. It's also why we have been tacitly encouraged to forget such things as Vimy Ridge and D-Day.
Besides, once you mention swords, it's a short hop to "bombs bursting in air", which is simply unacceptable.
Line 4: a cross? Jesus Christ, that's worse than a sword!
Line 5: Hey, everybody! Did you know Canada has a history? It's not like they bother to teach much of it in school.
Line 6: A double whammy here. Valour? We had it once, but we've gone soft. Faith? That's an f-word. You can't say that in public.
Lines 7 and 8: The Constitution we live under has no mention of our homes, or indeed of any property rights at all. No protection there. And given that somebody can break into your house at breakfast, waggle his butt through court at lunch, and be free to do it again after dinner, I wouldn't say there's much protection there, either. Where's that damn valour and faith when you need it?
This is a nation of contradictions. We say we want a vibrant Canadian culture, immerse ourselves in Hollywood culture every chance we get, and define ourselves chiefly as "not American". We fancy ourselves great stewards of the environment, but our record on greenhouse gas emissions is worse than that of the United States and we waste energy at a profligate pace. According to a recent poll, 47% of us are bothered by "lack of time", but 70% of us watch at least an hour of television each and every day. This country is massive...its size defeats most imaginations...but it's not big enough to house Toronto's garbage.
But most of all, this is a country of bitchers and moaners and assorted bellyachers. It rivals hockey as the national pastime. We all think we're so hard done by, but hey! we're allowed to express that sentiment without getting dead.
Canada: a great country. Try it on for size.
2 comments:
I hear ya, Ken, even though trashing Canada feels slightly sacriligous to me, because I have other points of reference that are far worse.... Like the so-called "democracy" (more like corrupt-to-the-bone capitalistic chaos) that's now in Russia and Hungary, and Germany where (though my standard of living was better than anywhere else) I always felt I was an "auslander", and was reminded of it on a frequent basis.
Here in Canada, I feel I belong. I feel that I'm a valued member of the community, I was able to put down roots and make friends. I was able to build a life for myself, never once feeling that I shouldn't be here. So yeah, I agree, there are a lot of flaws in our politics and our government, but nobody (nothing) is perfect. If it was, life would be really boring... I mean, what the heck would we bitch and moan about? LOL. Anyways, all Canadians, THANK YOU for making me feel welcome here!!!!!
I wish more people thought like you do, flames. I love this country. Sometimes we have lover's quarrels. I always lose: it's a big country. But it's the nature of lover's quarrels that I can walk away thinking I have won, anyway. *smile*
And yes, for all the corruption our government has seen, it's squeaky clean compared to most. I think many people forget that. It's sad that so many people take Canada for granted.
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