Letter To Me

I've been meaning to do this post for a long time, ever since I first heard Brad Paisley's "Letter To Me" last year. If I had to compile a list of my favourite songs of all time (and I wouldn't even want to try), this one would rank at, or near, the top.

It starts off if I could write a letter to me

and send it back in time to myself at seventeen...

Seventeen. 1989. Grade 11. I don't live in the past any more, my present is far too lovely for that...but when I did, 1989 was the year I flashed back on more than any other. Events that came much later are blurry or completely lost to memory, but much of that particular year I can recall vividly if I choose to.

I was in love, for one thing. I'd had little cases of puppy love before that dating all the way back to third grade (I never went through any kind of girls-are-icky stage)...but this was the whole kennel. I'd known this woman since she sauntered into my music class in September of 1987, wearing a denim jumpsuit she'd sewn herself. It sounds corny as hell, but all my internal sensors went redline on me the instant I saw her and didn't really stabilize for three years (an eternity, in teenage time). 

By 1989 we'd become good friends, occasionally trembling on the verge of something deeper, but never going over the edge. She moved away that year; I've only seen her once, since. Thanks to the marvel that is Facebook, we're still in touch, still friends after a fashion. Thankfully, the overhyped teen besottedness has evaporated.

1989 wasn't just Darlene, though if you read my diary from that year, you could perhaps be forgiven for thinking she was the only thing in all existence. 1989 was also the year I finally started to make friends outside of class, friends that thought nothing of inviting me over or coming over themselves. (Yes, it took that long.)  Thanks to the marvel that is Facebook, I've recently reconnected with one of those. 

1989 was a year of ups and downs, but overall to that point was the best year of my life. School was going well, the future looked bright, and I was just starting to discover myself. 

If you'd asked me then to imagine my future now, I would have been wrong in almost every particular. And yet...I'm happier now than I could have comprehended in those supposedly happy years. As Paisley sings,

I'd end by saying have no fear

these are nowhere near the best years of your life...

............................................................................................................

If I could write a letter to me

And send it back in time to myself at seventeen

First I'd prove it's me by saying, 'your ambition for this year

Is to learn and play the Phantom score with Darlene sitting near...'

And then I'd say I know it's tough

When you can't compete with all that buff

And I know you really like her, so why can't she seem to see

You're not just a geek with glasses, you're as loving as can be...

And oh, you got so much going for you, going right

But I know, at seventeen it's hard to see past what's in sight

She isn't right for you, I think deep down you know that's true

Come on, Ken just admit it, you've got some growing up to do

You'll make it through this and you'll see

You're still around to write this letter to me...

When you start school at I.D.C.I.

Don't hold Westminster's torch so friggin' high

And when you get a date with Sandy, why not play along

For God's sake don't be stupid and deprive her of her prom...

Each and every time you have a fight

Just assume you're wrong and John is right

And you should really thank your mother, 'cause she's done the best she can

And her best is pretty good, just watch her boy become a man...

And oh, you got so much going for you, going right

But I know, at seventeen it's hard to spread your wings in flight

Tonight's her soccer game and you're there to cheer her on

You should have told your parents, because they're wondering where you've gone...

Trust me, a liar ain't what you should be

Not if you want to write this letter to me...

You've got so much up ahead, you'll make new friends

You should see your house and wife

And I'd end by saying have no fear, these are nowhere near the best years of your life...

I guess I'll see you in the mirror

When you're a man grown

P.S. Go spend some time with Uncle Ted, every chance you can...

And oh, you got so much going for you, going right

but I know, at seventeen, it's hard to see that inner light

I wish you'd study business

I wish you'd learn the stuff John knows

I wish you wouldn't worry, let it be

Just have a little faith and you'll see

If I could write a letter to me

To me...