How do you people do it?

This is addressed to all you folks out there who live by the phrase "I'll sleep when I'm dead".

I'd try that, except (a) I like sleeping and (b) I'd like to live a good long while yet. If I adopt that particular philosophy, I think I'd be dead within a week.

As far as I can remember, I've always been this way. Most kids I've seen hate the very idea of bedtime...I don't think I ever did. Oh, sometimes I might have wanted to play a little longer, but once I got tired, I don't recall ever trying to convince myself, let alone anyone else, that I wasn't.

I stayed up until 11:45 on Sunday night, watching the closing ceremonies with a wistfulness that forestalled fatigue. I was up at my usual 5:15 Monday morning...and soon after that the trouble hit.

The only thing that saved me was that practically everybody was at least as bad off as me, probably worse. Canada had itself a mass drunk on Sunday night, after an amazing 80% of the population watched at least part of that hockey game. (Just try to tell me this country isn't hockey-obsessed. Just try.)

I don't drink. But on Monday, I felt hungover...worse and worse as the day went on, until I was sure I was going to yark. I made it until 7:45...not because I wanted to, believe me. I just knew if I followed the overwhelming urge to go to bed at five, I'd sure as shit be up at midnight, awake the rest of the night and all day today.

And that was after one night of five and a half hours' sleep. I'm given to understand five and a half hours sleep is pretty close to what many, if not most, people get each and every night. I just want to walk up behind you people, tap you on the shoulder, and scream 'WHY AREN'T YOU DEAD?!?!?