775 hours and counting...

or, Mousebound (II)

That's 32 days...46531 minutes...2791885 seconds...

That I can figure out at least the minutes in, well, seconds--that should give you some small idea of how obsessed I am with the upcoming trip to "The World".

Disney in a little over a month. Can there be anything else to think about?

My darling wife is getting a little Dis-y, quite frankly. She hasn't quite forbidden the D-word in the house as of yet, but I sense it must be getting close. I told her this morning I would blog some of this Disney-itis out of my system. For over six years now, writing has been my chief stress release, and excitement is its own special kind of stress, particularly when everybody in your real-life vicinity isn't quite ready to feel excitement at this pervasive level.

Compounding the issue: a couple of colleagues and friends are now...RIGHT NOW...at Disney World, she by emphatic choice, he by grudging assent. (He told her he'd go if she could find a way to make Disney cheaper than Atlantic City... I can't help but wonder if she inflated the price of Atlantic City, as (shh) I told her to.

As this trip approached, Andy magically morphed into John Pinette. I think I heard every word of this routine multiple times:

And I'd laugh at him every time. Lauren has enough joie-de-vivre for both of them: she'd live at Disney World if she could. I have no doubt Andy will come back and just as grudgingly admit he had a good time...even if it is 100 degrees with 95% humidity. (Lake Buena Vista, Florida: 77 degrees right now, 94% humidity, and that's accessible with one click from my desktop. Something is wrong with me.)

Luckily, therapy is available online, in the form of DISboards.com. Total immersion therapy...what? Is there any other kind?

You laugh, exasperated, but let me tell you there is value in seeing you're not the only one totally consumed and badly in need of a Mickey or two. (Although it's disconcerting to find it's almost invariably the female half of any couple that's obsessed...) Still, there are folks out there whose immersion level makes mine look trifling. People who have booked their resort, then changed it four and five times because they can't make up their minds where to stay. People who have their every step in the parks planned out commando-style.

That ain't us. We considered each of the 33 resorts on-site in turn, decided on Old Key West, and promptly forgot about it. (Almost: I've had little niggles about the sheer size of the place and the fact we might not get a refurbished villa, but niggles are all they've been.) News came last month of a welcome 40% discount on our accommodations...boy, all these incentives floating around sort of gives a clue to the state of the U.S. economy.)

Our dining package gives us one "quick-service" and one "table-service" meal for each day of our stay. We reserved our table-service meals six months prior, as required (or at least strongly encouraged). The hardest to snag was a table at Le Cellier in EPCOT. I guess this is currently the place to dine at Disney: we attempted to reserve on our first eligible day and were told it was full up; we got in on a different date instead.)

And yes, Mr. Pinette, we're booked in for both a breakfast and a dinner buffet.

Eva flat out refuses to consider where to spend our quick-service credits and, obsessive planner that I am, I agree with her on this. There has to be some spontaneity.

We've got the weather thing licked, I think. The October climate in Florida looks to be similar to ours at the height of July, if the humidex numbers are to be believed. So we're employing countermeasures that go well beyond sunscreen. Eva had a UV-blocking "sun-brella" shipped from Phoenix, AZ that she's already made much use of (and let me tell you, Canadians have no idea what to make of a person carrying an umbrella when there isn't a cloud in the sky). We've got a Camelbak™ for hydration. We've got a sun hat. We've got a portable fan complete with painted Canadian flag. We'll employ any and all of these measures to beat the heat, and should the heat beat us anyway, we'll simply high-tail it back to the villa for a swim or a nap. Aside from ADRs (advance dining reservations), we don't have to be anywhere, anywhen. What's the worst that could happen? We only see half of what we putatively planned? Well, then, that's a good excuse to go ba--

Okay, okay, one trip first.

One tip I've gathered from the DISboards is that there's a lot of walking. I Googled the acreage of each park in the World and was nonplussed to find they were all roughly the size of Canada's Wonderland: big, but not too daunting. I was quickly set straight. The average day at Disney involves a minimum of five miles' walk, possibly as much as twelve. One day will tire you out...seven days straight without prep and you might lose your feet. It seems rather absurd to train for a vacation, but I guess I'd better start.

We're taking a different, allegedly much more scenic route down than we did on our Destin trip three years ago. Eva's planning on quitting smoking while in Florida (as she says, if Disney World can't distract her, it's a lost cause) and so, for ease of navigation and minimal stress on the return trip, I suggested we take I-75 all the way back. That necessitated an updated copy of Along I-75, and as if there weren't enough reasons to recommend this book...

Research showed there'd been a great many changes on this route between the 14th edition we own and the 16th, slated for publication while we're in Florida. I therefore emailed the author and asked if this 16th edition would be available for purchase a mere two days after its publication date. Dave Hunter himself, not some flunky, answered my email within an hour of my sending it, and told me that he was sending out an information package to mail-order customers shortly; prompt response would have the book in my hands three weeks before we leave and a month before it shows up in bookstores. He'd also enclose discount coupons for both Along I-75 and its companion Along Florida's Expressways.

Highly impressed.

Everything is coming together, and drawing nigh. 774 hours and counting...I'm feeling decidedly Goofy.

But then, that's nothing new, right, love?