Just try to predict the NHL this year.
I'm telling you now it can't be done. We'll all look like fools, each one of us who dare to progno-stick-ate. All that can be said with any certainty is that sixteen teams will make the playoffs and one of them will win the Stanley Cup. Which one? Pucked if I know.
Oh, yeah, and Washington will suck. (Sorry, Anthony. Is it any consolation that I'd watch any game featuring Alexander Ovechkin?)
So, because I've never been afraid of looking stupid, here are my thoughts on what will transpire over the next nine months.
1) SORRY, OTTAWA, THIS AIN'T YOUR YEAR EITHER. Oh, they'll make the playoffs again. And they might even go a round or two. But the team that's perennially missing just enough to miss it all will still be missing in action when it counts. Offense they've got in abundance. Defense is still adequate for a playoff run, despite the loss of Chara. With apologies to Ray Emery, they've got a real goalie for the first time in years. But they're still short heart. Let me Don my high, starched collar for a second and note that no team with a European captain has ever won the Stanley Cup. The World Cup and the Olympics matter more to them, and always will.
2) TORONTO WILL BE LIFE AND DEATH TO MAKE THE PLAYOFFS. AGAIN. Despite something of an overhaul this past summer (new coach, new goalie, additions to the defense corps), I honestly wouldn't be surprised to see them finish below where they did in 2005-06. There are two reasons: One, the goaltending is iffy. The best goalie in training camp--the same guy who almost carried the Leafs into the playoffs last year--will back up the second coming of Jim Carrey. Remember him? One fantastic season, never heard from again.
The other reason: no scoring. The Leafs were 27th overall in goals scored at even strength, and they'll be extremely hard-pressed to do any better this year. To succeed in the "new" NHL you need to get scoring from at least three lines. The Leafs don't have a legitimate first line, let alone two or three.
More on the Leafs later. Suffice it to say that I wrote the above with a heavy heart and a brain calling "Reversies!" The Maple Leafs: good or bad, I love 'em.
3) DUCKS-PREDS CUP FINAL. Ducks will win in 6. Anaheim was one of the best teams in the league last year and they added the best available player on this year's free agent market without sacrificing overmuch. Nashville would have gone further last year if Vokoun--one of the great unsung goalies--had stayed healthy. They, too, have upgraded and look threatening. Of course, any of a million factors could throw this out the window: we could see Sabres-Flames, or Rangers-Sharks, or Capitals-Blackhawks, or...no, sorry, we won't see that last. Washington sucks.
4) An easy one: AT LEAST FIFTEEN PLAYERS WILL SCORE OVER 100 POINTS. Some (Thornton?) may approach 150. Any goalie with a GAA under 3 will be something special. I'm predicting that group will consist of Kiprusoff and maybe Brodeur.
5) GARTH SNOW WON'T LAST THE YEAR. Wang should be changing his mind any day now. Hey, I've played hockey on Playstation! I should apply!
6) Despite the fact that Washington sucks, Ovechkin will beat out Crosby again in point totals this year. Sid is a shade more of a playmaker, cursed with being on a team where there's little to make plays with. It doesn't matter that Ovechkin's more talented than the rest of his team put together. He'll grab the puck and do things with it himself.
7) BOSTON WILL IMPROVE BY AT LEAST TWENTY POINTS and should probably make the playoffs. It's not so much Chara and Savard, though God knows they'll help. It's a whole new atmosphere around a Bruin team whose morale was stomped to death last year.
KEN'S PROJECTED CONFERENCE STANDINGS, 2006-2007
(and because this bloody Blogger doesn't support tables, they'll have to be in one long column. Argh!)
EAST
Buffalo
Carolina
New York Rangers
Ottawa
New Jersey
Boston
Montreal
Atlanta
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Philadelphia
Florida
Toronto
Tampa Bay
Pittsburgh
Washington (sucks, see?)
New York Islanders
WEST
San Jose
Minnesota
Nashville
Anaheim
Calgary
Detroit
Dallas
Vancouver
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Edmonton
Colorado
Los Angeles
Columbus
Phoenix
St Louis
Chicago
GAME ON!!!
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