Tuesday, February 01, 2005

On Marriage

Today, the federal government introduced a bill to amend the Marriage Act. This bill, if it passes, would redefine civil marriage to be a union of two 'persons". That's all it wll do. There are many things it won't do. It won't criminalize heterosexual marriage. It specifically won't force churches to solemnize marriages they are uncomfortable with.
That's not good enough for many Canadians. A sizeable majority oppose same-sex marriage: 65%, according to a poll conducted by CanWest Global and the National Post. Of that 65%, about 32% would accept same-sex "unions", as long as they weren't called marriage; the rest don't support homosexual marriage under any name at all.
A group called Enshrine Marriage Canada has produced a declaration on marriage that seems to sum up what many Canadians believe. I'd like to present this manifesto, which is divided into seven articles, and rebut each article as I go...because, to put it mildly, I disagree with pretty much everything in the document. So, without further ado:

ARTICLE !
MARRIAGE AND THE FAMILY ARE UNIVERSAL

All human beings are born of a mother and begotten by a father. This is a universal biological reality and the common experience of all people. The state supports the institution of marriage because it promotes and protects the father-mother-child relationship as the only natural means of creating and continuing human life and society.


Oh, we're off to a glorious start, aren't we? It's amazing how "natural" always seems to be defined as "the way we do it". Of course, these days, what with artificial insemination, a child may only technically be "begotten" by a father. And the state doesn't really support the institution of marriage. If it did, you'd see a real tax benefit in getting married, wouldn't you?

ARTICLE 2
MARRIAGE MEANS ONE MAN AND ONE WOMAN

Marriage in Canada has always been defined as "the union of one man and one woman", the chief function of which is to promote the biological unity of sexual opposites as the basis for family formation. Governments may want to support other relationships, but these should not be called "marriage", or confused with it.

This argument starts off with an appeal to tradition: "this is the way it's always been". Here's some other long held beliefs about marriage:
  • People should not marry for love, nor should they be free to choose their own spouse. This job is properly left to the parents, who are much wiser than their chldren.
  • White people are forbidden to marry black people. This is a crime against society called miscegenation. For many years it carried a hefty legal penalty. The social stigma persists to this day.
  • A man should have no more than four wives. That's in both the Bible and the Koran.
  • Women are less than human. They are chattel. They are to be purchased: having bought your woman, you have married her, and she is yours to command...or kill, should that be your wish.
  • The price of a woman plummets if she is not a virgin.

Do any of these--any of them at all--strike you as archaic? Offensive? Can you concede that beliefs about marriage have changed over the years?

ARTICLE 3

MARRIAGE IS CENTERED ON CHILDREN

Marriage is a child-centered, not an adult-centered, institution. No one has the right to redefine marriage so as intentional to impose a fatherless or motherless home on a child as a matter of state policy.


Marriage is a child-centered institution? Really? But children can't get married in Canada. And the traditional wedding vows, which date back several centuries, make no mention of children whatsoever. You would think that if marriage was a child-centered instituion, the ceremony of marriage would at least reference kids someplace.


ARTICLE 4
MARRIAGE RESTS ON FOUR CONDITIONS
Marriage is a solid social structure resting on four conditions concerning number, gender, age and incest. We are permitted to marry only one person at a time. They must be someone of the opposite sex. They must not be below a certain age. They must not be a close blood relative. Those who satisfy all these conditions--each of which safeguards the well-being of children, the family and society--have a right to marry. The removal of any of them threatens the stability of the whole structure.

Let's tackle these condition by condition.
NUMBER: As previously mentioned, polygamy comes standard in many societies. You even find polyandry (one woman, multiple husbands) in some Asian cultures. Since the people who wrote this hooey have a real penchant for mentioning kids, I'll do the same. Ever heard the saying, "it takes a village to raise a child"? That's the literal truth in many African nations. Alternate structure exists; marriage as an institution has not collapsed.
GENDER: Since 2003, several thousand gay couples have been married in Canada. I challenge you to find me one straight couple that has divorced because of it. An alternate structure exists; marriage as an institution is not threatened.
AGE: The minimum age for marriage has differed throughout history. Not all that long ago, it was fairly common to see eleven and twelve year olds marrying; in ancient India, arranged marriages took place when the couple was no older than eight. An adult marrying a child does present obvious problems with regard to an imbalance of power in the relationship, but age in and of itself has not, historically, been an issue.
INCEST: The regulations on this vary from region to region. (In many states of the U.S., first cousins are permitted to marry, no questions asked.) And in the past, incestuous marriages were common and desired among royal families. This condition--admit it--is only in place because a majority of people feel it should be.


ARTICLE 5
MARRIAGE IS ABOUT MORE THAN EQUALITY
All government policies are intentionally preferential. If we want welfare or veterans' benefits, or child support or marital benefits, we have to qualify for them. Such policies are ordinary forms of distributive justice through which, for its own good, the state discriminates in favour of some people, and some relationships, and not others. So an absence of "equality" is not a good argument against such policies. As same-sex partnerships already receive the same benefits as marriages, however, something else is at issue: an attempt to persuade the public that such partnerships are of the same value to society as marriages. But they can only be made so by denying the unique contribution of marriage as a biologically-unitive, child-centered, institution.

Nobody's talking about value in the fight for same-sex marriages. Nobody I know gets married out of a duty to society. The qualifications for government benefits can change. Are you entitled to veterans' benefits if you never served your country in wartime? Can you still claim child support if you re-marry? Can you qualify for welfare if you are an immigrant? In some places, yes, in some places, no. None of these things is static. Neither is marriage.
I'd further argue that same-sex couples do NOT recieve the same benefits as straight couples. For one thing--one BIG thing-- they are not automatically entitled to benefits upon the death of their partner.

ARTICLE 6
MARRIAGE IS ABOUT MORE THAN LOVE
The fact that two people say they love each other does not, in itself, justify a right to the benefits conferred by the state on married couples. The only justification for a state interest in the privacy of love flows from the connection between the political fact that the state has a fundamental concern for its own survival and well-being, and biological fact that all human beings require someone of the opposite sex to create life, and the social fact that children have a natural claim to the love and support of their own mothers and fathers. Accordingly, the only kind of private love that is of justifiable public concern is the love that occurs between two people who qualify for marriage according to the four conditions in Article 4.

I'd like to repeat part of that. "The only kind of private love that is of justifiable public concern" is the love between two people who qualify for marriage. I agree with this! Love between homosexual partners is not a matter of public concern! So stop being so concerned about it and let them get married, for the love of God!


ARTICLE 7
MARRIAGE BELONGS TO THE PEOPLE
Marriage is an institution that has arisen from long-held beliefs and customs of the people that are prior to all states and all courts, and are essential to the very fabric of society. Any attempt by unelected officials of the courts, or by any other branch of government to claim ownership of marriage, to alter it without the support of a significant majority of the people, or diminish the father-mother-child relationship in favour of the state-citizen relationship, usurps the natural rights and freedoms of the people and constitutes a serious breach of the public trust.

Marriage as an institution does predate all states and courts, but it has changed over time. It is not essential to the very fabric of society, because it is not necessary to marry in order to procreate. The family is not the basic building block of society in the same way that carbon is not the basic building block of the human body. The human body is, at root, made up of atoms, which arrange themselves in many different forms. So is society made up of individuals, who are free to arrange themselves in wide variation.
Marriage "belongs" to married people. And only my marriage belongs to me. Your marriage belongs to you. It doesn't belong to the state. It doesn't belong to the church. It certainly shouldn't belong to a group of politicians in Ottawa that you've never even heard of. Most of all, it doesn't belong to groups like Enshrine Marriage Canada.



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